Finally some art around here!

I am finally in the mood to create! Cindy and i went shopping this weekend to a few jewelry and bead shows that were in town. It was so fun just being around jewels and stones again. Of course the main show we went to was WAY out of our league but we had fun looking at all of the tiaras and very large assortment of diamonds. It was very inspiring! I bought some stone beads and and a couple vintage pieces. One of them is a sterling silver filigree pendant from the late 1930s. That is the piece i am working on tonight so you will have to stay tuned. Oh by the way, Cindy designed and "installed" this business card for me, isn't great??!!?! LOL...it makes me look like a cool artist! I am offically no longer the artist that doesn't make any art!

Bono's Blog 5/23

My family has been working on another hair brain scheme. We'll most of My family. Me included. Of course its not working. Over the last couple weeks my Mom, Dad and I decided we were going to cut back on some of our vices. My Mom and Dad made a pact to eat less. Me and my Dad made pact to cut back on booze and gambling. Carty on the other hand he is going to have nothing to do with this. In fact he went in the other direction entirely. He decided he was going to kick things up a notch. Needless to say Carty is the only one having any success. 1st of all last week my Mom and Dad came home with a load of groceries. Including Klondike bars and some other chocolate covered oatmeal cookie ice cream sandwiches that I can't even describe how good they are. The this weekend they brought home a gigantic package of pork ribs to grill for the long weekend. Apparently they got it for a great price because they were really excited about it. They had planned on cutting back on eating, now they are high fiveing over meat. Obviously the plan is not going well. The deals I have with my Dad are not going well either. Last Saturday we couldn't resist the lure of the Preakness. We won, but gambled none the less. I have 2 months allowance bet on the Lakers winning the NBA title. And get this, Myself, Mom and Dad killed 2 pitchers of margaritas last Saturday night while watching Juno. Yes, My Mama was knocking down margaritas like nobody's business. This morning I drank half a bottle of white zin while watching the Price is Right. I'm drinking the other half as I'm typing this. On the topic of drinking on a weekday morning. I got to tell you, you have to give it a try. There is something about the extra sinfulness of it that makes it better. I think we have all indulged like this someway. Why are the bad things the most fun? As mentioned earlier, Carty is not cutting back on any of his vices. The vet told him he needs to loose weight. Since then he's been eating like a maniac. He claims life is too short to cut back on things. He's really trying to prove a point. None of us are really sure what the point is but his determination is impressive. I haven't seen him go after anything like this since he decided he was going to watch all seven Police Academy movies. He accomplished it. He even threw in Police Academy Girls on Skinemax for good measure. Since we went to the vet he has been trying to pickup on every female that comes with in earshot. It's been amazing. He says he needs to get all he can before he gets so fat that he has no chance at all. For the first time I can remember I think I admire Carty. If nothing else at least he has the ability to be honest with himself.

Bono's Blog 5/15

I'm glad everyone took so much joy out of my misery last week. Thank you. Yes, my ass is felling significantly better. To address Rochelle's comments, no I won't do stand up comedy at your wedding. I will do sit down comedy though. I think standing up is sooooo cliche. I'll even do it for free. I do have list of conditions though. These all are non-negotiable. I want my own trailer. And I want anybody that wants to meet me to have a special credential that they have to wear around their necks to get to my trailer for a meet and greet session. I love those neck credential things. I've always wanted to have to wear one of those. This is also a way to keep any crazy relatives away from me. Don't tell me you don't have any. Every wedding has them. The cousin that is just out of jail. The aunt with no teeth. The belligerent alcoholic uncle. The slutty niece. Keep them away from me. I watched the video of my Mom and Dad's wedding a few weeks back. The majority of the people there were freakin nuts. I couldn't believe what I was adopted into. I almost drove my self back to Petsmart. Well back to my list. I want a VIP table for Me, my Mama and our closest friends. We must have two personal waitresses. They have to be hot of course. With natural breast. I'm not into the silicon thing. In fact I'm not really into human chicks at all. But female cats make really crappy waitresses. If there is a good game on that day I'll need a plasma screen at my table as well. An open bar is a must. It has to be stocked with the good stuff two. I'm partial to Gray Goose and Patron. If I see a bottle of Smirnoff anywhere near my vodka tonic, I'll walk. If the Chicken Dance is performed, I'm out of there. I do insist that the Macarena is played, at least twice. One of my biggest disappointments in life is that I was born after the Macarena craze. God, I would have loved to be around for that. Next, Clint Holmes must open for Me. I love that guy. Vegas just hasn't been the same since he left. The housing market in this city went to hell after he left Harrah's. I don't think that's a coincidence. Speaking of Vegas acts. I'm disappointed that the Amazing Johnathan is still around. The only thing amazing about that guy is that people pay to watch him pretend to cut off his fingers. Sorry, I strayed again. Ok my final condition is that when I'm nicely buzzed I get to give a slightly inappropriate but yet sentimental and endearing toast. You know. One of those where everybody is kind of looking at each other at first. Asking who the hell let this guy grab the microphone? But by the end they have a tear in their eye and it gets a big ovation. I've always wanted to give a toast like that. So there are my conditions. Let me know when and where.

Bono's Blog. It's been a rough week.

Hi everyone. It been a rough week for me. First of all, to address Cindy's comments on my last blog, no Absolutely Cindy did not win. She did make a little run in the race to make it a little exciting though. Yes, I have been mourning Eight Bells. I'm not sure if it's good or bad to be an animal in this Country. On one hand the death of a single horse got more news coverage than the death of 100,000 people. I'm just as guilty of not paying much attention to it. I'm not quite sure where those people died either, but I heard a little something about it. But then again I'm a cat. What I also want to know is why are the people that are so outraged over the death of Eight Bells, not outraged over the tens of thousands of cats that a euthanized every year? I'm yet to see a news report on that. In my last blog I already addressed some of the hypocrisy in regards to the criticisms of horse racing. Going back and reading it, my comments now seem eerily prophetic. I wish it wasn't so. It completely ruined our Derby weekend. It also kind or ruins the rest of the Triple Crown because we'll have to watch the races holding are breath hoping something like this does not happen again. It's hard to get excited about that. I don't want to sound dismissive of the problems of horse racing. It certainly has them. But this is just another example of misplaced priorities in our Country. On that same note I had no idea that PETA was such a shameful organization. I figured that an organization that's called People For the Ethical Treatment of Animals was a good organization. I found out this week that they are basically an organization that is after self promotion and grandstanding. It turns out that they are one of the leading killers of cats and dogs in this Country. According to the Virginia Dept. of Agriculture they killed %97 of the animals they "rescued" at their "shelter" in that State. If you want to donate to a charitable organization regarding animals, don't donate to them. Give to the ASPCA instead.......So this started my week bad enough. It got worse today. I'll start from the beginning. A few weeks ago the reminder from my vet that Me and Carty are due for our booster shots went up on the fridge. My Mom and Dad keep our appointment date secret because they correctly assume that I will go into hiding that day. The reminder stayed ominously posted there for us to see everyday. I'm not sure if it is some sort of mental torture that they are trying to pull off, but it is not very nice. I tried disguising my voice as my Dad's a couple times and tried calling the vet's office to confirm my appointment date to find out when it was. But the stupid receptionist caught me. I called and asked when my appointment was and she would simply say "I know it's you Bono, stop calling" click. Well this morning, it turned out to finally be the day. I went in without much of a fight. I figured I just better get it over with. A trip to the vet is never good. But this one was worse than usual. When we first went in me and the receptionist exchanged glares. Then the vet was not there till later in the AM so my Mama could not stay with us during our shots, which really sucks. When the vet finally got there we got our check up. They take our temperature with a rectal thermometer. Can anybody explain why there has been no significant advancement in taking a cats temperature? If PETA really cared about animals they would be addressing this. They just grab me and stick a thermometer in my ass! No warning, nothing! They should at least talk dirty to me or something. Get me prepared somehow. We'll after that I got a shot of Benadryl. I had an allergic reaction when I was a baby. I don't remember the incident but it gave my Mama quite a scare. So now before all my vaccinations I get an extra shot. Goody for me! Then they put Me in the lovely holding pen for a while before my vaccinations. I guess they want me to think about it for a while. Then I finally get my shots. Shots, plural. I thought I was just getting one. It turns out that I was do for another one. Wooh hoo!! I'm almost positive that freakin receptionist convinced the vet to give me an extra meaningless shot to get back at me. After our shots they put Me and Carty into a cage. You people call them kennels. But let's be honest ok. Is a damn cage. It could be worse. Our vet's office is cats only. Let me take you back to our vet in Albuquerque. In a similar situation we were also in a room with caged up dogs. Once there was a big ole' pincher that would just keep barking. Endless, woof, woof, woof. Loud as can be. Carty and two other cats that we knew from the neighborhood were plotting a way to shank him if they got a chance. Prison style. Fortunately the three of them had the combined IQ of 4 and nothing happened. But I have to admit, I think I would have been ok with it. Ok, back to today. I'm in a cage with Carty. Next to us is some other cat that Carty decides to have an endless conversation with. Every topic under the sun. The election, hockey, chicks, nip, litter, the subprime mortgage crisis. Basically a bunch of stuff neither one of them knew a damn thing about. Then in the cage on the other side of us they put a cute Siamese named GiGi from Spring Valley. She was in for a urinary track infection and you can tell wanted nothing to do with anybody. So naturally Carty hits on her. Three different times!! Through all this I was just trying to get some sleep to make the day go faster till my Mom picked us up. But with all this going on it never happened. When my Mama showed up I asked the vet if I could have a few beers when I get home. She said no. I can't have beer with my vaccinations. I had been looking forward all day to having a few beers and watching the Lakers game. Just another bad break. So now I'm here, sober with a sore ass. So that was my week. Oh, I forgot. The handle on our carrier broke and we were dropped in our carrier. Twice.


P.S. Happy Mothers Day. Bon.

Bono's Derby Picks and other people's too.

The first Saturday in May is a big day in our household. Well except for my Mom. It's Kentucky Derby Day! I know none of you care, but I'm going to blog about it anyway. I'm not even going to try to explain why it's a big deal. If you don't get you just don't get it. It's kind of like the guys not being able to pee in the toilet/litter thing from my last blog. Horse racing used to be the most popular sport in this Country. Those days are long past but Myself, my Dad and Carty are pretty into it. A lot of people find people or cats betting on horses running in circles as mindless and shallow. They can think what they want but I don't find it anymore shallow than blowing money on a overpriced purse, a 60th pair of shoes or some other article of clothing that will go to waste in a closet. A couple years ago I paid money to watch a Keanu Reeves movie. I would have much better lost that money on a horse race. That's an $11.50 and 2 hours of my life I will never get back. Come to think of it I would have rather lost that money down a gutter. So that might not be the best example, but you get my point. And for those of you who think racing the horses might be cruel you probably own a whole bunch of stuff made out of cow skin. You know thay had to kill them 1st right? They don't wait for them to die from old age. Anyway, I wanted to touch on something before I make my picks. There are lots of methods to betting horses. My Dad and Carty are very analytical. They gather information and make choices based on that information. I do a little of that two, but I basically make my bets by gut feeling. I'm also a big believer in fate. I think everything happens for a reason. Not always a good reason, but a reason none the less. Yesterday I was looking at the horses entered in the Kentucky Oaks. The Oaks is kind of like the Kentucky Derby for girls. They run it the Friday before the Derby. The number 2 horse in the race is name Absolutely Cindy. I bring this up because Cindy Dean is one of my few loyal readers. I also thought it was cool because it was spelled correctly. One of my peeves is when people try to get too creative with name spelling these days. It's common to see Cindy spelled Sindy, Syndee. I guess parents think there cool if they needlessly change the spelling of their children's name. Like it's hard to do. I'm waiting to see names like Genahpher, Mykheal or Baughknow. We'll back to my story....Last week my Mama took Cindy on a "Food Adventure". Which meant eating in an exotic place like Chinatown in Vegas. What an adventure!! I thought seeing this horse's name might be fate. So I suggested to my Mama to have Cindy take a financial adventure and put a few bucks on Absolutely Cindy. Then my Mama told me that I should bet it for her. Which I'll do. I'm starting to think that big reason in this thing is for me to lose another horse race, but I'm doing it anyway. I'm putting $10 on her nose for you Cindy. She is a longshot so it will pay a pretty penny if she wins. If you win you have to donate some of it to the The New Scatching Post for Baughknow Fund. It's a great charitable organization.....Here is the field for the Derby.

1 1/4 Miles | Open | 3 Year Olds Stakes | Purse: $2,000,000

Prg. #
1 Cool Coal Man
2 Tale of Ekati
3 Anak Nakal
4 Court Vision
5 Eight Belles(F)
6 Z Fortune
7 Big Truck
8 Visionaire
9 Pyro
10 Colonel John
11 Z Humor
12 Smooth Air
13 Bob Black Jack
14 Monba
15 Adriano
16 Denis of Cork
17 Cowboy Cal
18 Recapturetheglory
19 Gayego
20 Big Brown

I mentioned before that the Kentucky Oaks is for girls, well the really good ones can run in the Derby. The horse with the (F) next to her name, Eight Belles, that means she is a Fillie and a good one, so she is running in the Derby.....Like I said I kind of pick from my gut so here are my top 4 picks, most of all I hope all the horses make it through safely.

1. Adriano
2. Big Brown
3. Eight Belles
4. Pyro

My Mama picked Tale of Ekati. The Ekati part of the name is from the name of a diamond mine in Canada. That's why she picked him.....here are Carty's and my Dad's picks. I don't know why they can't get their own blog. I stole this blog fair and square. But I'll be nice and put there picks on here.

Carty
1. Big Brown
2. Recapturetheglory
3. Gayego
4. Pyro

Dad
1. Colonel John
2. Big Brown
3. Z Fortune
4. Pyro

Good luck if you bet the race....Bon.